Actually, Would You Mind Thinking Before You Shout Out Your Orders?
Do you really speak to people like this?
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Actually, Would You Mind Thinking Before You Shout Out Your Orders?
Do you really speak to people like this?
I think of myself as someone who doesn’t like complainers and drama. My mantra has always been to live and let live. If you don’t like a TV show, change the channel. Don’t like a book? Stop reading it.
But I’m noticing more and more posts barking orders into our feeds. Of course, you can scroll past, block, or delete, but what if you’re not in a good place and aren’t making the best conscious decisions?
Here’s an example, and this one is re-stacked, re-tweeted, and posted all over by profiles supposedly helping us to be mindful:
Stop taking your phone to the bathroom.
Stop using your phone when you're eating.
Stop checking it during every moment of downtime.
I can scroll past—thanks, but no thanks. My choice. But it’s not always as simple as that.
As someone who has spent decades listening to others—self-improvement experts who must know better than me—I know firsthand how easy it is to promise yourself you’ll do what they say and improve yourself.
But that didn’t happen, and now I know why. Mainly, it was because it wasn’t the right advice for me. All I was doing was turning their way of doing things into my own ‘shoulds’—a brand-new way of beating myself up. Now, I have enough confidence to do things how I want and to know that it’s the right way. For me.
Leave people alone to give themselves some grace.
Yes, everyone else also has the choice to scroll past, but some people, albeit temporarily, aren’t able to do that. They may be dealing with bereavement, a debilitating mental illness—who knows what. The problem is, the authors of these orders have no idea either. Mostly, it seems to be orders to stop doing something without any suggestions on how to actually do that.
Of course, it’s excellent advice to leave your phone out of the loo, away from your food, and out of the bedroom. But there are times when we just need to hold on tight to these coping mechanisms.
If you’re a coach barking out these orders in your posts, then, in my opinion, you should be ashamed of yourself. Would you talk to a client like that? I’d be livid if you spoke to your dog like that.
Do you really think people don’t know that overusing their phone isn’t the best life tactic? It’s a bit like smoking, isn’t it? Do we honestly believe that every single person still smoking hasn’t heard the message about the dangers and is puffing away in complete ignorance? Of course, they know, they are just doing the best they can with what resources they have available to them right now.
Stop it. Have some respect for the road other people may be travelling.