On Speed, Naming Stuff, Books and Exercise 🫣

If you're going round in circles and getting no-where, then this is your edition

Aug 06, 2023

🤔 Thought for the week

Sometimes you can't make the boat go any faster.

You may have set a goal (see further down for more). You may want to make stuff happen in your business; you may even be working really, really, really hard, putting in the hours to reach the finish line, but nothing doing.

Sometimes it doesn't matter what you do, for how long or hard; there isn't any forward movement.

An example for me was finding the right words for two of the most significant projects in my business. I needed an overall purpose for what I do and wanted a new name for one project, the Psychic Health and Beauty Fairs that I run monthly in Kent, UK.

The overall purpose one I've been mind-mapping, brainstorming, vision-boarding, surveying and scurrying around trying to persuade it to at least peak its head out to say hello for the last 5 years.

The need for a new name for the Psychic Health and Beauty Fairs has made its presence felt since the end of 2022. Having 'psychic' as part of the title worked 7 years ago when I started them up, but as my businesses grew, it didn't fit in. I wanted more of the business community to get involved, and ‘psychic’ means different things to different people. To some, it means woo-woo, fraud and just a little loopy. If you're a professional therapist, it may not be the event you want to shout about working at.

My events come under the umbrella of Cafe In The Calm, and we (I say we because I did involve members of the events community) went through hundreds of different words, looking at origins, examining the numbers, standing in corners and reading them out loud. Months it went on for. Then I stood in the middle of the room, and it suddenly hit me - Calming Health and Beauty Fairs. Everyone smiled. Job done.

As for the purpose thing? Most of the exhibitors and visitors at the Calming Health and Beauty Fairs are Women. The Women In Business Big Show and The Women In Business Radio Show speak for themselves. When I'm booking people in as show guests or exhibitors, I encourage them to forgo expensive banners and branded displays for a simple way of sharing their stories. Stories make us real. Stories show what we're about and how we help. I've been encouraging this for at least 5 years.

I woke up 2 weeks ago with this in my head:

Creating Opportunities for Women In Business To Share Their Stories.

Isn't that so simple?

It also feels right. I'm not saying it won't change, but for now, it feels comfortable to say it aloud to myself, a person, and an audience.

My Top Tip for Checking a Title or Name

When you’re naming anything, stand up and say it out loud. Does it feel stupid? Does it feel light and comfortable? Do you feel proud as you say it, and does it create a smile?

Next, imagine sharing it during a telephone conversation - do you have to explain how it’s spelt and where there are hyphens and dashes?

If you don’t light up when you say it, or you have to explain it, then chances are, it’s not right.

It's easy to understand. It doesn't need explaining, and it piques curiosity.

But the real key here is the lack of technique to bring it about. I'd been trying too hard. I expected that using more tools and techniques would bring a faster, better and more creative solution.

In hindsight, what should I have done? Wait and let things ferment until the bubbles start appearing.

But, if a project has to get started and you need a name, you must come up with something.

Here are my tips for doing that, even if it's going to be a name you make do with until something better emerges.

Make the name compact enough to go on a business card.
Don't include hyphens, numbers or anything you must explain to people on the phone.
Stand up and say it out loud and check you feel comfortable. I realised how I had started to justify the ‘Psychic’ element of the event name - "It's the Psychic Health and Beauty Fair, but it's just ordinary people, but it's relaxing, but it's not spooky. You should never have to justify or explain your business like that. Something may be wrong if you have to say ‘but’ after describing what you do.
Type it out and make sure it doesn't have a hidden word in the middle - do not be Pen Is Us.
Sometimes you have to let the project run to let people experience it and give you feedback about how it makes them feel, what it delivers, and what they and you value about it.
Tell the universe you want a name. Set that intention and then let it go.
Be alert for when the name is delivered to your brain. Have a pad and pencil by the bed and listen to your first thought as you wake. Be ready to take notes when you're out and about, and listen to what people say. The gems are often hidden and come from the most unexpected sources.
Don't get yourself so vested in a name that you can't let it go without a wrench.

Some things cannot be forced, and not all gifts come wrapped up in a shiny parcel with your name on.

🧑🏻‍🎓What Have I Learned This Week?

It’s been a stressful week. Lot’s to do, and my brain seemed full to bursting. The Women in Business Big Show 2023 is just around the corner, and it feels as though I’m on permanent high alert.

How can I possibly fit more in? How can I calm down a bit?

I can do both by getting creative. Stopping to write, create some new cards - creating is a super way for my brain to slip into a different space for a while.

But I have a caveat. Creating is just that. It's not organising or learning, and often I unwittingly combine the two. I'm creating by writing for a newsletter or article, but I'm combining that with learning a new newsletter platform. That may be a great way to do things normally, but if I'm using creativity to relax, I have to keep it simple.

📖 This Week’s Book

More about switching off, and it's time for a story. I'm really into the Ruth Galloway series of 15 books by Elly Griffiths. They tell the tale of Archeologist Ruth Galloway. Each is a murder mystery with the story of her complicated relationship with a policeman and interesting characters that pepperpot her life threading their way through the series. Ruth is often seen as a difficult woman because she doesn't take nonsense, and I love her character.

As a busy businesswoman who loves what she does, I'm constantly dipping in and out of non-fiction books, but that isn't taking a break.

I asked my AI tool to help me write this, but I did have to take out some fluffy words, but here's a little explanation of why reading fiction is good for our brains and our business;

1. Stress Reduction: Reading fiction allows you to escape into another world, temporarily leaving your stresses and responsibilities behind. This mental break can significantly reduce stress levels, making you feel more relaxed and refreshed when you return to work.

2. Improved Focus and Concentration: Immersing yourself in a good book requires focus, attention to detail, and transferable skills to your professional life. Regular reading can improve your ability to concentrate on tasks, leading to increased productivity.

3. Enhanced Creativity: Fiction books expose you to new ideas, perspectives, and worlds, which can stimulate your creativity. This enhanced creativity can help you think outside the box and develop innovative solutions.

4. Improved Sleep: A regular reading routine before bed can help signal your body that it's time to sleep. Better sleep leads to improved cognitive function and productivity during waking hours.

5. Emotional Intelligence: Reading fiction can help enhance your understanding of human emotions, motivations, and interactions. This increased emotional intelligence can improve your interpersonal skills, helping you navigate workplace relationships more effectively.

6. Refreshed Perspective: Sometimes, stepping back from work-related challenges can provide fresh insights. Reading fiction offers this mental space, allowing you to return to tasks with a renewed perspective and potentially more effective strategies.

Incorporating regular reading into your routine can be a powerful tool for relaxation and rejuvenation. So pick up that novel you've been meaning to read - not only will you enjoy it, but you could also see a boost in your work productivity.

I suggest you get your fiction books as real books. I love audiobooks when I'm too tired to read; I love my Kindle because I can search, bookmark and take all my books in my handbag. However, sitting down in the quiet, turning crisp paper pages over is far more of an escape from everyday life for me.

This Week’s Quote

This is actually the same as the last quote as I couldn’t find one better for this episode.

Look Good, Feel Good

Sometimes exercise can seem so complicated, and all you have is 10 minutes, and you can’t be arsed with organising or thinking. This is perfect - an excellent shakeout to get your lymph moving.

I've included a link to a video by Kim Eng (Eckhart Tolle's Partner), but you could just do this without - this gives you the idea.

📓 Thoughts and Words 📝

Goals vs Targets

Does this sound familiar as a way of succeeding in business and life?

Find your purpose. Set a goal. Fill in the smaller steps to reach it. Put one foot before the other and keep going until you get there.

I believed this for years. Decades. Even though it's never worked for me, I assumed it worked for everyone else, that everyone else neatly hit their milestones until they arrived, flushed and sweaty maybe, but they still crossed the finish line.

I was defective in some way.

I've never been good with goals. I don't enjoy setting them, mainly because I don't achieve them. I mainly don't achieve them because I forget about them. I mainly forget about them because (and this has only recently dawned on me) I'm scared I won't achieve them. 😵‍💫

Perhaps you can see the problem 🫣

When things aren't going my way, I often go back to basics and look in detail at the words I use, so let's look at the word goal.

From Middle and Old English, the goal has been used to describe the following:

A boundary, marker, limit, obstacle, the terminal point in a race, the object towards which effort is directed, the space between 2 posts in a sport where a ball is aimed.

The point about a goal is that it's the endpoint. It's also pass/fail. If you don't hit it, then you've missed it. Game over.

Let's compare goals and targets.

Targets can move, which is a much better idea because our circumstances change. How many times have you heard about moving the goalposts? Well, they will move because that's just what happens, but shifting the goalposts sounds rather sneaky, as though life is unfair. I'm used to dealing with moving targets.

So much of what we want to achieve depends on factors outside our control. You may set a goal to publish your book by 1st May, but your publisher, editor, designer and Amazon may have a different agenda.

You can miss the bullseye but still get a good outcome by hitting at least one part of the target 🎯

A goal is an end point, the boundary limit. So what's next?

If you don't hit the goal, that's rather IT, isn’t it. If you don’t hit the bullseye in your target, you still get some marks and, you may find another arrow in your quiver.

Of course, there are times when a goal is needed because an endpoint will be reached.

Still, I've realised most of what I had set as my goals are targets, and that's a more flexible, adaptable approach that encourages creativity in my projects.

🎧 Latest Radio Shows 🎙

I host the Women In Business Radio Show, recorded live in our UK studio and transformed into a podcast on Substack, Apple, Google and Spotify.